This is a tough situation for any parent/guardian and honestly, there is no easy answer. Part of the solution is going to include your child, your guidance, and possibly the employer.
Remember, your reaction is going to influence your child. Therefore, it is just as important for you to remain solution focused and it is best to put your personal emotions to the side when speaking to your child about their employment concerns. I know this is hard for any parent to do, especially if you are your child’s main support source; but, keep in mind, you are providing support, just in a different, more empowering way now. I recommend: Talking to your child and learn what his/her concerns really are (maybe he/she just had a bad day-it happens!) Next, list each concern and write them on paper. Measure each concern. Is the concern easy to solve or more complex? Before doing this, determine and explain with your child what a simple concern is and what a more complex concern is-provide examples when you need too. Decide, can my child solve this on their own? Do they require minimal support from me? Or do I as a parent need to help them more directly through teaching and guiding? Depending on what the concerns are, teach your child problem solving steps and strategies. Some concerns will be easy to solve, while others may require you to guide your child to reach a successful outcome. For example:
For some concerns:
Follow-up with your child to see if the problem has been solved. If the problem hasn’t been solved find out from your child why – it is extremely important for you, as the parent not to reach out to the employer, and I like what one parent had to say about supporting their child while working in the community: “This is a bit of a tricky question because there are so many things that have to be taken into effect to our children working in the community. My son has been bullied, set up by co-workers to look bad, and had questions asked about him that are strictly information gathering from fellow employees (one in particular). Our children are very trusting and naive in some instances and they can be taken advantage of very easily. I am very careful to not paint working as a negative in ANY light as my son can easily label the "entire" experience as negative instead of the one aspect. I always refer to any shortcomings as lessons that he will need to learn to deal with for years to come, as the same issues often creep up at other employment situations in any company. I always tell my son to report to his direct manager of situations that warrant attention. Often he will come home upset about a certain situation, I will talk him down, talk about possible solutions he can do with the next encounter or direct him to talk to management. Our kids often do well with simple emails to managers for the times that it is necessary. This also helps with a good paper trail for our kids, we can also monitor the outgoing email (proof reading so it sounds politically correct), and incoming of the managers email back to see if what is said is meant in a certain way or context. We often talk about results and intentions of others and himself. I do find that the biggest obstacle is educating fellow staff about our children's way of learning.” In the unlikely event that your child needs further assistance than what you can provide or you would like to seek external advice about an employment situation you can reach out to an employment agency in your area such as TeamWork Cooperative, YMCA or Job Junction, or connect with Ready, Willing, & Able by emailing [email protected] just like one parent did: “My daughter’s employment recently ended. As her parent, I have been feeling quite unsettled about this and don’t know how best to support her, as I don’t feel I have a good grasp on the situation. I asked her about it but was not confident that she had all the details. I also was not confident that she was given the whole story. It somehow seems wrong that they brought her into a private space upon arrival, told her the job was ending immediately and sent her home right away without a chance to say goodbye to coworkers?? The only other thing I can think I could do would be to email a Ready, Willing, & Able staff member and try to set up a meeting. I understand privacy issues however I am the key support person for my daughter and I think it would be useful for her if I am in the know.” I feel very impotent about this and would love to hear some other ideas. I look forward to your feedback on this issue.” When concerns come up during your child’s employment you may at times feel like you don’t know how to best support him or her; but remember, you are not alone. If you need to reach out to a family member or friend who can lend an ear to listen, then do so. If you need more family support you can also reach out to Autism Nova Scotia’s Family Support Coordinator, Jenny Tyler at [email protected].
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Picture yourself at your first job. Maybe you were working in the fast food or customer service industry. For the first time, you’re expressing your independence in a professional setting. You learned new skills, developed work relationships, and made money by yourself! These are essential skills that any individual needs to learn at some point in their life.
Now, imagine that your parent or caregiver walked in and started asking your boss how you’re performing in your new role. Words cannot express the level of embarrassment that a teenager or young adult would feel at this prospect. It’s a caregiver’s right to be curious about their child’s first job. This is doubly true for a child on the autism spectrum who may have struggled throughout their life with the social and work-related skills they are now developing. However, there are appropriate and inappropriate ways of learning about their work experiences. So who do you ask? Do you approach their case worker? Autism Nova Scotia? What about human resources, their supervisor, or even their job coach? The answer to these suggestions is a clear and resounding NO. If you want information about your child’s work experiences, you ask your CHILD. Nobody can provide you with a clearer interpretation of your child’s experiences in the workplace than they can. Their strengths, weaknesses, and areas they would like to improve are all just a few questions away. However, we do recognize that some teenagers and young adults, especially in the autistic community, have trouble relaying information to anyone, let alone their loved ones. Here are a few useful hints that will help provide you with information you’re looking for:
If Executive Functioning makes it difficult for your child to answer those questions, contact the employment division of Autism Nova Scotia for continued support. Our team will be happy to work with you and your child to develop strategies that allow you to better understand their work experiences and what you can do as a caregiver to assist them. Using one of the solutions suggested above will not only benefit you but it will ensure that you do not infringe upon your child’s newfound independence. For years, you have been supporting your child through school, social commitments and life in general. You have comforted them, ensured their needs are met and now…. now they are ready to engage in the world of employment. A scary and very exciting time. So, how can you best support your autistic adult job seeker in finding employment? Skills and Assets When the question of employment and careers come up, work together with your child to identify what skills and assets they bring to the working world. Make a list together of things your child enjoys doing and what attributes they have- are they exceptional at organizing? Have a keen attention to detail? Punctual? Once you have the list, try to link to jobs that excel in those skills. It is important, however, to differentiate what makes them happy- though important- and jobs they should strive to have. For example- a person who likes video games will not necessarily make a great video game designer. Or a person who likes to cook may not be able to handle the hustle of a kitchen atmosphere. When deciding on a career path, although likes and dislikes are important to include, it is also important to look at the overall environment of that career to ensure sensory and workload is sustainable. ‘Soft Skills’ can also be worked on at home. These are skills that are not necessarily worked on at the workplace, such as: having a strong work ethic, a positive attitude, time management, flexibility etc. but are essential to long lasting employment. Often an employee can do the job well but the soft skills are often what causes them to feel uncomfortable in their new job. The more you work on these skills at home, the more success they will find in the workplace. Beyond Skills and Assets Appropriate hygiene is an important place to start with your young adult job seeker. Proper hygiene could be the difference between a successful and non-successful interview. It is even more important on the job! It is essential that the young job seeker understand the importance of hygiene when entering the working world. Another place where parents can support the young job seeker is with transportation. Supporting your child in learning how to take the bus can be the difference between independence and reliance. As they begin their job search and discussions about working life, this could be a good time to approach the idea of more independence- taking the bus, doing their own laundry, teaching them to cook- these life skills will allow them to be self sufficient on their own and will, likely, succeed more at the workplace because they understand the value of hard work and independence. Furthermore, you could examine volunteer opportunities in your community. This will allow them to get some experience and possible references for the future. You could even, together with your child, look into work experience opportunities and community resources. Hand in hand with independence comes ensuring your young adult knows about safety in the community. This is particularly important should they receive a job when the hours are long and late. Skills such as calling for a taxi, asking the police for help, knowing the street names and ways home are crucial for success. A personal account of a parent with an adult son on the spectrum: Preparing our child for employment seemed like it would be the same as preparing him for any new experience in life. We would have to take the lead by guiding him toward employment, always with our ‘ready to educate about autism’ hat on and primed to advocate on behalf of our son so he would have his opportunity. We did not take into account that he is now an adult and needed supports that, as his parents, we could not provide well. Once we were introduced to and accessed those supports for him he was more able to actively participate in job search and successfully found employment. We continue to be his cheering section! Pre-employment Programs and Employment Support Autism Nova Scotia provides both pre-employment programs and employment support for those job seekers who feel they may need a little bit more guidance in terms of what it means to have a job, the unwritten rules, job experience plus much more. Our two main pre-employment programs are as follows- please go to autismns.ca for more information: Launch Pad: Adults with autism often struggle to gain employment after high school. LaunchPad is a comprehensive program that teaches the skills needed to enter the workforce. While we support our participants through real-life work experience and classroom lessons, our Regional Autism Coordinator creates connections with employers to develop jobs. See our blog for more insight into the daily activities of our participants. Classroom Lessons: Lessons take place 3 days per week for approximately 2 hours Work Experience: The Promise of a Pearl is a social enterprise that has gained the reputation for high quality, affordable jewellery made by people with autism, their friends and families. Participants learn how to make products, manage quality control, package retail orders, and be a part of the Promise team. Customer service experience takes place at the Halifax Seaport Market and various craft events. For more information contact: David Paterson at [email protected] EmploymentWorks EmploymentWorks Canada is an employment program for adults with ASD who are out of high school, up to age 29. The program consists of twice weekly sessions comprised of structured, tailored content aimed at employment and social skill building. Participants also get the chance to sample various types of employment through job-shadowing at a minimum of 4 locations throughout HRM. A few key goals of EmploymentWorks are to increase community engagement by promoting benefits for the workplace, expand workplace hiring and accommodation practices, empower individuals to build skills and reach employment goals, and build confidence. Evaluation tools are used to assess the effectiveness of the program and participant goals. Eligibility criteria for EmploymentWorks Canada include:
It often feels, as a parent, that you need to support in all capacities when it comes to your child. The good news is that there is plenty of support for adults on the spectrum. The Employment Supports Coordinator at Autism NS connects individuals to employment agencies to help them further with their job search. Employment Agencies can do a lot to help in a job search. They have free access to computers/printers and everyday they post new jobs that are available around the city. Furthermore, they offer 1:1 case management. This means the job seeker can meet 1:1 with a case manager who will find out what kind of jobs they are looking for, recommend workshops and help to tweak their resume/cover letter when they find a job they would like to apply to. If the job seeker get an interview, the Employment Support Coordinator can also help them with mock interview support and, if they would like, attend the interview as long as they have disclosed to the employer previous to the interview. Furthermore, if the job seeker gets the job and has disclosed, then Autism Works can offer them a job coach to help support them 1:1 in their first few weeks/months of work! The short of it is: the job seeker is not alone! With support at home, support from Autism NS and support from their community, they are on their way to having long lasting, enjoyable employment. You had a successful interview and now you are offered the job- before saying “YES” – Do you know what it really means to accept a job offer? Working in my role as an Autism Outreach Coordinator I have learned that “working” means something different to everyone. Some Job seekers attached to the Autism Job Seekers Database say that accepting a job means: “To commit yourself and your skills (as they apply to the position you're being hired for) to the goals of the company. It also means that I am going to do the best job that I can to reassure them they hired the right person for the job.” “The employer is willing to learn about autism and/or has some sort of previous experience with people on the spectrum. Also it makes a big difference in my daily life. It allows me to live on my own and do what I enjoy doing every day.” “Well, to me, accepting a job offer is pretty much what it says it is- getting the job.” “It means to finally be given the opportunity to work at the job you applied to and to prove your worth to that employer and the people who work there.” While other job seekers believe that telling an employer “yes” to the job means: “Accepting a job offer means taking the next step in independence and moving forward as an adult and getting your first job.” “To commit yourself and your skills (as they apply to the position you're being hired for) to the goals of the company. It also means that I am going to do the best job that I can to reassure them they hired the right person for the job.” “In my experience, accepting a job offer is a dangerous gamble. Why? Because going in, there is a sense of optimism from the employer that I can be that person I pretended to be during the job interview. In reality, I am not and cannot be that person. Being a female on the spectrum, I have found myself disproportionately directed into "customer service" and related fields, regardless of my education, personality, aptitudes and preferences. The NS employment market wants customer service workers, be they cashiers, wait staff, receptionists, tour guides, or other front-line staff to address public (customer) requests. What is ironic is that clerical work and customer service are my two main areas of weakness, and as I near age 50, the refrain that I can "learn" these skills or adapt by "trying harder" rings more and more dishonest every time I hear it. What does it mean to accept a job offer? The danger of losing my Disability support, as meager as it is, because it is the only income or support I have that doesn't depend on pleasing others. The repetition of a familiar pattern: fake a "normal" personality in job interview, complete with lies like "I am a good team player"; last about a month at the job before the inevitable questions about how odd I am arise, to my face and behind my back; tension escalates and I am fired or quit due to the overt workplace hostility.” There is no right or wrong opinion about what it meant to accept a job. However, when the day comes that YOU do accept a job, this is what an employer will expect from you without directly telling you: When you say “yes” to an employment offer, you are making a commitment and an employer expects you to keep this commitment You will be expected to be dependable, dress appropriately and work professionally. Working professionally means: you show up to work on time, you have the skills and knowledge to complete your job with the best of your ability, you respect others and company polices. Depending on what job you are hired for, you may have to work evenings, weekends and holidays. If you are unsure you should ask your employer. The employer may ask you to work extra hours. Extra hours are hours you work outside your regular shift. All employees might be expected to attend team meetings, organizational events, and other events such as: Annual General Meetings, Christmas Parties, webinars and team building exercises. You might be expected to participate in professional development which will help you contribute to the organization you are working for. They may require that you problem solve and think on your feet. You might need to demonstrate a positive attitude, especially during stressful times. Take instructions and directions from the people training you and from your new supervisor. To be honest. When you make a mistake you will take responsibility for it and ask for help when you need it. You can also expect things from your employer, such as: adequate training, safe working conditions, fair and constructive feedback from your supervisor. To help you find out what your employer expects of you:
If you do accept a job offer and you need support from a job coach, Autism Nova Scotia offers on and off site job coaching. A job coach uses different strategies to help you learn to perform job tasks to the employer's specifications and to learn the interpersonal skills necessary to be successful at your job and in your work environment. If you are an individual with autism and need a job coach or are interested in learning more about job coach support contact Employment Support Coordinator, Sheila Pearson at [email protected]. |
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